06-07-10

What a wonderful day of creativity. My tears and release in the woman's retreat
has given me a new energy to live. Well, the sun has something to do with that also. I couldn't sleep very good. I felt tired but after I settled in I saw 1:30, 2:30, 3:30 and I think 4:30 then finally I fell asleep. I mean the sun is up by that time. I even got up at 1:30 and wrote and read and wondered through the house. I don't usually like doing that but I am not going to stick to the old things anymore.A retreat gives you a new outlook on life. I want to go to a art retreat. I wonder if I could get one of those together. What fun is that? The difference with me today was being open to a new way to do things. I got to create outside, and inside. I cleaned off the deck and washed the furniture, bought a couple new chairs for by the pond and fire pit. A whole new color. I did buy a few flowers also. One thing I did notice that today was my compulsion. I was doing a cleanse and that means I am not eating solid food, it is a detoxing cleanse and I found myself wanting to put things in my mouth (food or drink). Then I went to the buying place and I actually let myself buy. I found myself a little uncomfortable with this new clearing and wanted to fill it up. I am going to explore a book about your shadow. Debbie something is the author. I like living in this new open heart feeling even though it is uncomfortable. I can live through the discomfort of the new.
The challenge for you today is to see what may happen to you when you feel a little uncomfortable. Do you reach for a cookie, a drink, get ready to buy something. The challenge is to live in the discomfort and just notice it. You will survive. Last night I actually thought maybe I was having a heart attach or maybe I have a disease with my bones. Aches and pains made my imagination and my tired mind go to strange places, but I lived through the discomfort. I got up and got dressed to go for a jog and I did job for almost 2 mile. That is good for these old bones. HA! Happy creating. I feel a very safe place to create. Right here, Right NOW!!!